Spring break 2010: How to re-create your college days

You put your arms in the air, secure your coconut bra and shout a “woo-hoo” that’s shrill enough to break windows.

Your boss isn’t thrilled.

Just when you think you’ve finally conquered college nostalgia, spring break hits.

It seems only logical for the real world to annually offer a mandatory week off to account for warm weather and wet T-shirt contests.

Too bad that’s just a fantasy.

Sure, your adult self could head to Florida for a few days. However, your vacation comrades will likely be different from your college partners in crime.

Booty calls might be replaced by calls to the corporate office. Shot glass souvenirs could be bumped by gifts for the kids.

Don’t worry: If office life prevents you from traveling for a college-inspired spring break, it’s easy to re-create the scenes that dominate your dreams.

With these suggestions, you’ll be quickly basking in the sensory experience of Cabo San Lucas, Cancun or Daytona Beach.

Touch: To simulate the comfort of cramming 10 people into a small hotel room, spend a week sleeping sans blankets on your kitchen floor.

Sight: Go crazy with a too-bright shade of blush to re-create the “I should have used stronger sunscreen” look that almost always characterizes a spring break trip’s aftermath.

Taste: Drink your morning coffee through a funnel or pour your lunchtime Coke into a shoe. Nothing screams “spring break” like a refusal to rely on plastic cups.

Sound: Die-hard spring break fans might stage a water cooler catastrophe in the office break room to initiate an impromptu wet T-shirt contest.

Unfortunately, the results aren’t always pretty.

So you’re more than welcome to just blast relentless techno beats all night — while you’re sleeping on the kitchen floor, of course.

Smell: If you’re a novice, simply spray coconut tanning oil in your office restroom on a daily basis.

Craving something stronger? Place a couple rotten eggs under your vehicle’s driver seat to resurrect the gnarly aroma that dominates the typical college road trip.

Woozy? That’s OK.

Because if you’re really lucky, re-creating spring break’s highlights will help you realize some traditions stay in your college phase for a reason.

Reminisce often, but don’t be too intent on traveling back in time.

After all, with just a little creative thinking, it’s easy to make your current reality a modified version of your past fantasies.

And fortunately, your boss never has to know you’re wearing a coconut bra underneath that turtleneck.