Crime blog: CPD investigates the beast with two backs

ariquelmy@ledger-enquirer.comJanuary 15, 2012 

Shall I compare thee to a quickie behind the Lewis Jones? Thou art more indecent and more unclothed.

Like that? I actually stole it from a recent Columbus police report.

It's all true. According to the report, an officer responded to a report of a car parked behind the 13th Street grocery store about 1 a.m. Wednesday. The officer got there and spotted a 2012 Honda Accord parked behind the building.

The car's lights were off, and the officer approached the vehicle. He looked inside and saw a 23-year-old man and a 22-year-old woman in the passenger seat, um, making the beast with two backs.

Well, what would you do in that situation? I'll tell ya what the officer did: he knocks on the car's window, has the couple get dressed and get out of the car. He charges both of them with public indecency, a misdemeanor, and gives them a summons to appear in court at a later date.

The officer then advised both of them to go home.

Let that be a warning to all you would-be sonnet writers who woo women behind grocery stores.

Ledger-Enquirer is pleased to provide this opportunity to share information, experiences and observations about what's in the news. Some of the comments may be reprinted elsewhere in the site or in the newspaper. We encourage lively, open debate on the issues of the day, and ask that you refrain from profanity, hate speech, personal comments and remarks that are off point. Thank you for taking the time to offer your thoughts.

Commenting FAQs | Terms of Service