Intense violence and sexual situations unsuitable for some viewers, it's Monday Mail.
Walkers
Our opening's from the warning on AMC's soap-opera zombie series "The Walking Dead" (or "Days of Our Lives -- With Zombies!" or "The Young and The Lifeless").
It lurched into another season Sunday, so zombie-watchers like me are killing off a lot of life time that will never reanimate.
Speaking of killed time, a second "Walking Dead" anachronism hit me Sunday -- another peculiar absence to add to the characters' occasional inability to find firearms and ammunition in Georgia, where they could have cleaned out every gun cabinet and police agency from Atlanta to Woodbury.
Where are all the wildlife scavengers?
Besides the stiffs still up and stumbling around, human corpses are scattered all over heck and half of Georgia. But are they being eaten by buzzards, crows, coyotes, raccoons, opossums and feral pigs, like any carcass would be?
No, they are not.
What's up with that? Have the zombies learned to play dead until a vulture lands, and then eat it?
The only other issue is that in the script, it takes way too long for the other survivors to shoot an annoyingly sanctimonious character named Dale, whom they don't kill until he has been mauled by a zombie. In reality someone would shoot him in the head a lot sooner, like maybe even before the zombie apocalypse.
So the whole plot's just starting to seem way too unrealistic, if you ask me.
Romneyland
Speaking of reanimation, you can go on and vote for Mitt Romney today if you want. Or President Barack Obama.
Early voting begins today at four local polls. What's more important than picking a poll is seeing your sample ballot first (online at mvp.sos.state.ga.us), because it's loaded with state constitutional amendments and city charter changes.
On the plus side, the Sunday alcohol sales referendum probably won't take much forethought.
Zombiebook
Speaking of zombies, again, here's a comment reader "ster402005" posted to a Sept. 22 column reporting that if on vacation you go way the heck up into the mountains to get away from it all and neglect to disconnect from the Internet, the Facebook zombies find you and consume your brain with pictures of their infants, their lunch companions, their political views and the Jack-Handyish "Deep Thoughts" they pilfer from inspirational websites peddling fatuous profundities:
Ummm, are they feeding the writers at the paper bath salts now?
Dear ster402005:
We can't use bath salts in combination with all the caffeine we're getting from coffee, sweet tea and Coke.
Tim Chitwood, tchitwood@ledger-enquirer.com, 706-571-8508.
