I’ll be nice and give you an extension.
Maybe you were so caught up in assembling your sexy police officer costume last weekend that you overlooked a calendar notation critical to the dating world.
Halloween was your deadline for escaping an unhappy relationship.
The belief sometimes circulates on dating blogs. The logic? Stay in a bad relationship after Halloween, and you’re trapped into attending a deluge of holiday activities as a couple.
Thanksgiving is a few weeks away, but you and your significant other are likely already planning which family dinners you’ll visit.
Those discussions inevitably lead to talks about Christmas dinners — gatherings where you’ll introduce your new partner to your family and endure questions about marriage, engagement and/or babies.
If that image makes your stomach turn, get out now. I’ve extended your deadline until 10 p.m. tonight.
The Halloween theory makes some sense.
Taking a relationship into the holidays is somewhat of a commitment milestone, even if you bypass those daunting family dinners.
We’re approaching calendar dates that generate all sorts of sentimentalism. Not to mention an upcoming onset of engagement ring commercials sappy enough to make even independent women contemplate a life of commitment.
But a Halloween — err, Halloween-ish, given your extension — guideline has some flaws. Avoiding a breakup during “the holidays” is a fine goal, assuming you know how long “the holidays” last.
It’s feasible to conclude that for relationship purposes, an understanding of “the holidays” encompasses Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year’s and Valentine’s Day.
Speak now or remain silent until late February?
There’s no good time to break up with somebody. You must always deal with the chance of spoiling an upcoming birthday or other monumental occasion.
You might stick things out through the holidays only to learn that your partner has a strong emotional attachment to National Frozen Food Month in March.
Nobody’s heartless enough to sever romantic ties while watching a significant other savor the defrosted wonders of Stouffer’s Lasagna.
It’s nice to think that you’re sparing your partner’s feelings by strategically choosing a time to break up. Unfortunately, somebody’s bound to get hurt no matter when it happens.
So it’s best to think seriously, speak carefully and avoid mentioning that I’m the one who gave you an extension.
Sonya Sorich, reporter, can be reached at email@example.com or 706-571-8516.