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Election '08 draws near

As we countdown to election, most talk centers around who voted early and how long they had to wait -- or in some instances – if they waited at all. Some people actually went from one polling place to another in search of the shortest line. Some people eventually gave up and will take their chances Tuesday.

And one factor becomes clearer as we head toward Tuesday-- it really is “Us vs. Them.”

Some people, for instance, think voting early gives “Them” a chance to make some of “Our” votes disappear. Not so, others say. “If God’s got your name on a biscuit, you don’t have to worry about anybody else eating it.”

No one was able to produce a copy of the printed information that allegedly surfaced at some South Columbus addresses that stated due to record voting turnouts, Republicans and Democrats were slated to vote on different days. Guess who was NOT supposed to vote Tuesday?(And to think Sarah Palin’s nickname on her high school basketball team was Barracuda.)

Wednesday night on David Letterman, comedian Paul Mooney talked about how African Americans will celebrate an Obama-Biden win.

It’s a win-win situation for blacks in this country, he said.

“No black man has ever gotten this far,” Mooney said. “And if you white people think we went crazy for the O.J. verdict, you ain’t seen nothing. We’re going to jail. We’re going to run into the streets yelling, ‘Obama beat your mama. …’ ”

Then true to his signature style of comedy, Mooney said negativity – blaming everything on Obama -- has already surfaced:

“Oh, my butt itches.”“It’s Obama.”

“I lost my job.”“That damn Obama.”

“My check didn’t come.”“Obama.”

Meanwhile, people in the beauty shop Thursday were concerned about polls. Who are the pollsters? Are they Us or Them? And who are they polling? Us or Them?

Some talk show hosts say there’s a lot more joke material with McCain and Palin, whom Alec Baldwin referred to as McBush and Bible Spice. But nobody is off limits.

Jay Leno said one part of Obama’s 30-minute infomercial, shown on the three major networks Wednesday night, was a bit odd.

“. . . At the end, Barack said, 'If you vote now, we'll throw in a set of steak knives and a can of OxiClean.' " Leno said things are not looking good for McCain. . . . “In fact, today he went down to IKEA because I think he realized this could be his only chance to put together his own cabinet."

No matter what happens, Palin has made her mark. But she has broken the first rule: She believes the hype.

Meanwhile, many of “Us” owe Dan Quayle an apology.

Contact Kaffie Sledge