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Michele Bachmann: I am a real jelly doughnut

We here at PP&B have recently been on the campaign trail, meaning that we haven't been updating as much as we should have.

Another reason for our itinerant posting habits is that we're a part of the corporate machine and have been making quite a bit of cash under the table by not taking pot shots at national politicians.

However, the checks have stopped coming and our anger has once again grown into a mighty wordsmithing fist which shall smash the political infidel. Or make lame jokes at someone else's expense. Whichever.

Take, for example, googly-eyed Michele Bachmann, who apparently is popular in some parts of our great republic. Bachmann, who is seemingly running for the presidency, recently told a crowd of people that she is a "real person."

This isn't science fiction, folks. It's science fact. Bachmann believes that by somehow relating to the electorate that she has a chance at sitting in the big chair.

This is foolish. People get elected because they have tons of cash and the support of the establishment. Getting people to vote for you is really kind of secondary these days.

Take Barack Obama for example. The guy's got a load of cash and even though he's extremely unpopular you know he's going to get the Democratic nomination, just because he's the incumbent. Then, on election day, thousands of his supporters will get people to the polls, where they'll vote for him without really knowing why.

Can Bachmann raise the cash to get thousands of her people to rally the troops? Meh. We're more interested in seeing if she can survive the endless polls in Iowa and New Hampshire. If she does that, then talk to us about her organizational abilities.

Oh, and be sure to register to vote.