Sonya Sorich: The perils of Secret Santa programs

Maybe it got lost in the mail.

Or, maybe I just overlooked it. There’s also the possibility that she accidentally sent my gift to Columbus, Ohio, instead of Columbus, Ga.

Either way, I’m doing everything possible to avoid believing a harsh reality.

I’ve possibly become the victim of another lazy Secret Santa.

In elementary school, I had no problem giving a carefully chosen, custom-wrapped gift to a classmate whose name I randomly drew out of a hat.

But when it came time for me to receive a gift, things sometimes turned sour.

I was often the kid whose Secret Santa conveniently “forgot” about the program. I also had some years when I received generic, clearly recycled gifts.

Things got slightly better in adulthood, but not enough for me to stop believing I’m the target of a Secret Santa conspiracy.

So I was a little hesitant to sign up for a Secret Sister program this year.

The plan sounded simple enough.

Someone would send me the name of a random alum from my college sorority, and I’d anonymously send her gifts throughout the holiday season. Another sorority alum would randomly receive my name and do the same.

For many participants, I’m sure the plan will work perfectly. However, my mailbox remains empty.

I felt a twinge of elementary school angst upon seeing another participant thank her Secret Sister “for the lovely surprise in the mail” on Facebook.

Before you get too invested in my sob story, I have a confession. I haven’t sent anything to my Secret Sister.

Wait, please don’t judge me.

Even though I got my Secret Sister’s name on Oct. 12, the program didn’t have a designated start date. I assumed I’d send something to my Secret Sister after I received my first gift. You can see how well that worked out.

With that realization, my life became a really sappy holiday movie.

While focusing on my own gift-giving disappointment, I’ve managed to destroy someone else’s Secret Sister experience.

The moral of the story? If you’re going to participate in a Secret Santa program, you have to actually do stuff. We’re all busy and strapped for cash, but don’t sign up for a gift exchange if you’re not willing to make a slight sacrifice in the name of someone else’s happiness.

That said, you can’t base your satisfaction with the program solely on the gifts you receive.

From now on, I’m following my own advice.

I’ll stop obsessing over my own mailbox and instead focus my attention on my neglected Secret Sister.

I’ll send her something by the end of the week. Don’t worry, it’ll be cool, creative and cheery.

And if the person who got my name eventually sends me a token of appreciation, I won’t complain.

Sonya Sorich, reporter, can be reached at ssorich@ledger-enquirer.com or 706-571-8516. Visit ledger-enquirer.com/blogs to read her Walk of Shame dating blog.

This story was originally published November 29, 2011 at 12:00 AM with the headline "Sonya Sorich: The perils of Secret Santa programs."