Jeff Hendrickson and Dawn Minty can’t recall a single bicker-free road trip in their 10-year marriage.
They were happy to read anecdotal evidence suggesting 99 percent of married people hate the way their spouse drives in Eric Saun Wan’s “Stuff Every Husband Should Know.”
This handbook for husbands, on sale April 5, isn’t just about surviving car rides. It’s about surviving marriage. Chapters include “How to Side with your Wife, Not your Mother,” “Looking at Other Women Politely,” and “Women’s Clothing Sizes: WTF.”
Below Dawn and Jeff explain why they agree or disagree with the author’s tips on “How to Drive Together in Peace.”
“Leave on Time”
Jeff: No idea. I’ve never left on time in the 10 years I’ve been married.
Dawn: Agree. If Jeff learned to pack his own suitcase, lock doors and windows, write instructions for the dog sitter and unplug electronics, we would leave on time.
“Don’t be a Driving Instructor”
Jeff: Agree. During her multiple attempts to pass her driving test, my wife obviously received more expert instruction than I’ll ever be able to pass on to her.
Dawn: Agree. Jeff is not qualified to be a driving instructor. He seems to think the posted speed limit indicates the minimum required speed.
“Save the Rage”
Jeff: Disagree. If I don’t take out the rage in a safe and controlled place like the highway, I might take it out at an unsafe and uncontrolled place like home or work. I know my colleagues and dogs would not appreciate that.
Dawn: Agree. Hearing Jeff yell at other drivers makes me want to yell at Jeff.
“You’re not Jeff Gordon”
Jeff: Agree. I’m over six feet tall.
Dawn: Agree. Jeff Gordon is rich.
“Radio is Your Friend”
Jeff: Disagree. For us music doesn’t unite, it divides.
Dawn: Disagree. Jeff insists Beastie Boys’ songs are appropriate car tunes. I find Beastie Boys’ songs appropriate, well, never.
“She Controls the Climate”
Jeff: Agree. My wife’s internal temperature is often like her mood. If you wait long enough it will come back around to normal.
Dawn: Agree. Jeff doesn’t get the fine art of controlling the temperature gauge. It is often necessary to turn on the heat only to be forced to turn on the air a few minutes later when the sun’s glare has shifted.