Columbus mom on anti-bullying group’s hopeful start: ‘Way huger than I imagined’

Too often, when folks gather to help prevent an intractable social problem such as bullying, the discussion – full of good intention – focuses too much on sharing personal stories and not enough on sharing collective solutions.

But the public forum two Columbus mothers conducted last week was a hopeful example of citizens offering creative and promising ideas – and officials welcoming the input, respectfully listening and not being defensive.

Audra Nesseth and Lisa Jenkins, cofounders of the Facebook group “Stop Bullying in Muscogee County Schools,” told the Ledger-Enquirer in interviews Tuesday that they consider their initial meeting a success, not only because more than 30 residents attended June 6 in the Mildred L. Terry Public Library but also because they came away with three sheets of butcher paper full of suggestions.

“I think it was very productive in the sense that we are really getting a feel for how much of a problem (bullying) is out there,” Nesseth said. “It just goes to show how much our community is willing to sit at the table and come up with solutions.”

Nesseth divided the brainstorming into ideas that could be implemented on the district, community or state level. They include:

District level

▪ Counseling for victims and bullies should be enforced and implemented.

▪ Chain of command for handling complaints should be clear.

▪ Method of accountability should be clear.

▪ Start a summer program for bullies to learn how to stop.

▪ Follow up with parents.

▪ Clearly define bullying.

▪ Require bully’s parent to attend resolution meeting.

▪ Add more anti-bullying training for teachers.

▪ Instill messages of positive self-identity in students.

▪ Do anti-bullying programs in the schools not only once but throughout the year.

▪ Schools should set a goal to produce a certain number of random acts of kindness each year.

Community level

▪ Post bully-free zone signs,

▪ Clearly define bullying in the community and not only the schools.

▪ Encourage kids to report bullying before too it’s too late.

▪ Teach kids coping skills.

▪ Give adults who aren’t parents an opportunity to help prevent bullying as well.

State level

▪ Require bullies and their parents to provide community service.

▪ Hold schools and parents more accountable.

▪ Law should protect victims when they are truly defending themselves against a known bully.

Muscogee County School District superintendent David Lewis, Muscogee County School Board chairwoman Pat Hugley Green of District 1 and her sister-in-law, state Rep. Carolyn Hugley, D-Columbus, attended and spoke during the forum.

“Policies and laws by themselves don’t do much,” Lewis said. “It really requires us to take action. … Schools are microcosm of society.”

Punishing bullies is the easy part, Lewis asserted. “We have to drill down to see the root cause.” Many bullies have been bullied or live in environments where such behavior is accepted, he said.

Green noted so much of bullying occurs beyond the physical environment or schools or neighborhoods and is hidden from adults when children use electronic devices.

“We place the world at their fingertips,” Green said. “.. We need to teach the conflict resolution.”

Bullying has been a legislative issue in Georgia since 1999, Hugley said. The General Assembly updated the anti-bullying law in 2010, requiring the Georgia Department of Education to develop a model policy for school districts. State lawmakers updated the law again in 2015, adding cyberbullying to the legal definition.

“We have a law, but we have to be resolved in the hearts of our community,” Hugley said. “… We have a good start legislatively, but I think we have to work on this with our communities.”

The Rev. Johnny Flakes III, senior pastor of Fourth Street Missionary Baptist Church, moderated the discussion. Flakes also has agreed to serve on the yet-to-be-named organization’s board, Jenkins said, along with RiverCenter for the Performing Arts education director Rick McKnight, marketing consultant Trenna Trice, Muscogee County Superior Court Clerk Ann Hardman, Columbus State University College of the Arts executive director of development Cameron Bean, Georgia Appleseed Center for Law & Justice community operations and affairs director Teddy Reese and Muscogee County Superior Court Judge Gil McBride.

More than 450 members have joined the “Stop Bullying in Muscogee County Schools” Facebook group since it was established last month, Nesseth said. The next step is to form a campaign. Some possibilities include having a booth at Market Days on Broadway, a 5K run and a picnic, Nesseth said.

Another way to spread the message, already implemented, is participating in the public art project run by the Facebook group ColumbusGaRocks. Members paint rocks, some with inspirational messages, and hide them throughout the community. Then they post on Facebook images of the rocks they find. Approximately 300 rocks have the anti-bullying group’s sticker and a “no bullying” message, Nesseth said.

The anti-bullying group’s board, still being developed, must first decide on mission and vision statements, Jenkins said. It also must raise money and seek in-kind contributions to launch a campaign, she said.

“We’re looking at going to businesses and asking them to put up ‘No Bullying Zone’ posters and help us advertise,” Jenkins said. “… I know we can’t stop it, but we can educate and reduce it.”

Nesseth, who was motivated to start this group after her daughter was bullied, summed up her reaction to the encouraging response: “This is way huger than I imagined.”

This story was originally published June 14, 2017 at 1:02 PM with the headline "Columbus mom on anti-bullying group’s hopeful start: ‘Way huger than I imagined’."