You never know what personal battle a student is fighting

Today I walked down the hall behind a young man I taught when he was sophomore. Now he’s a senior.

He was one of my favorites in class, but when he was younger, he got in a lot of trouble. I would look forward to seeing his face in class, only to be disappointed quite often by another suspension for a poor choice he made. In Room 212, though, he was polite and funny and nice. Always “No, ma’am” or “Yes, ma’am.” Always a greeting when he walked through the door.

Today, he had his hoodie up, his hands in his pockets. He was literally moping down the hallway. I slumped my arm around his shoulders and asked, “Ryan, what’s wrong, buddy?” His face spoke volumes, but he walked in silence. I followed him into our miracle-maker’s office, our Graduation Coach. Mrs. Strickland is the go-to gal for seniors who need a little nudging toward their diploma.

Ryan spoke candidly to us about his desperation to graduate. Father of two, he finally had recognized the critical need to start his adult life with an education. He was seeking the wisdom of Mrs. Strickland, who offered him a large dose.

What sent him slumping into the hallway were some interpersonal conflicts with a teacher. Perhaps his teacher only knew of the former Ryan and held that against the improved Ryan. Perhaps she didn’t know Ryan hungered for a passing grade and was willing and quite able to earn it. Perhaps she didn’t care. Either way, he was ill-equipped to deal, so he walked out of class.

We talked him down from the ledge of giving-up, encouraged him to recognize how far he had come, gave a quick life lesson on being able to handle conflict, and then affirmed the efforts we would make on his behalf.

He went back to class, and I was left with our miracle-worker. She turned to me and said, “I didn’t know he has two kids.” Me either.

Can you imagine?

For many students in Columbus, academics comes easy. Behaving comes easy. Dealing with conflict comes easy. Doing school comes easy. Life moves along with little bumps and little diversions. But there is a grand number of our students who fall on the other side of the spectrum. Kids who will walk across the graduation stage toting baggage we can’t even imagine. Kids who graduate but by the grace of God — or the strenuous, relentless work of miracle-workers across the district.

I simply adore Ryan. He has such great potential that could have or should have been recognized a long time ago. Who knows the reasons why he was overlooked or overpowered by other more menacing influences? He was left uncultivated to grow into that kid who breezes through school. So, he had to fight, literally — with a kid on each hip.

The point is, he did fight. He is fighting, along with thousands of other kids across our great city. As a society, we can shame their plights and turn a blind eye to their predicaments, discounting them based on poor choices made. Or we can grab the hand of our educators and sit and listen to one child at a time. It’s a choice teachers make every day. Just like kids, though, some choose poorly, and some choose wisely. I tend to think we have more positive choosers than negative ones, and that gives me hope.

This story was originally published December 20, 2016 at 2:24 PM with the headline "You never know what personal battle a student is fighting."