Chris Johnson

Chris Johnson

Sometimes you've just got to hit something

My wife couldn't figure out what to get me for my birthday last week. I suggested nothing since I've got enough stuff in my life and prefer experiences over things. But, no, that wouldn't fly, so she dragged me to one of those sporting goods box stores.

Chris Johnson

Go get yourself some cheap sunglasses

This might shock those of you who know me, but I'm not the kind of guy who spends a lot of money on sunglasses — or clothes or restaurants or vehicles or golf courses or technology or tequila or the prescriptions the doctor thinks might keep me alive.

Chris Johnson

It's hard to out-conservative these Georgia boys

I've already cast my ballot this primary season in Georgia. I like early voting because, just as I said last week, I kinda like my elbow room. In fact, if it were up to me, we'd have a holiday where everyone could vote, an early voting period before that and a week before that when only I am allowed to vote.

Chris Johnson

And a child shall lead them — I hope

Are you worried about the growing national debt? Concerned about record high temperatures in the Arctic and melting sea ice? Are you a corporation tired of pandering politicians twisting your arm to make you provide special favors to their favored interests?

Chris Johnson

What would Iron Eyes Cody think today?

My work has occasionally taken me to some pretty poor areas of the world. One of the things I’ve noticed in third-world countries like Ghana and Nicaragua is that no matter how poor the people, they seem to be nicer, happier and more generous — on average — than most Americans I’ve encountered.

Chris Johnson

When you pull a Fred Sanford, go to the doctor

I really needed a weekend of doing absolutely nothing — no cleaning out the gutters, no painting anything, no building a 100-foot outdoor fireplace off the patio or any of that typical stuff. I also needed a column idea — I’ve been out of column ideas since roughly 1998, which should come as no surprise to anyone who reads this column once a decade.

Chris Johnson

Give your fellow humans plenty of elbow room

This flu season appears to be pretty bad, and it has set me to wondering whether or not I got a flu shot the last time I saw my doctor in the early fall. It’s possible. I recall some sort of pain, but it could simply be from when they told me what portion of the visit my health insurance covered.

Historic property owner in Columbus gets surprise demolition notice

Former Georgia state Rep. Earl Davis is scheduled to have a hearing Wednesday to save the historic elementary school he bought in February from the Muscogee County School District.